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Friday, October 20, 2017

More hospital stories

I have told some of you this story. During my last kidney stone removal surgeries on my left side I had a couple odd experiences. Evidently the anesthesiologist was a little generous with the gas those two days because I was out of it. Usually after surgery, that sucks that I know how it usually should go, anyway I am usually not affected by the anesthesia. While lying on the table in the operating room I was fraternizing or some would say flirting with the nurses. They are always so shocked that I am willing to talk and discuss pretty much anything while I'm waiting to go under the knife. Usually one of them will say, "Hey I think I remember you from last time or I remember you from somewhere." I think it makes me feel better or less nervous getting to know the people that are going to possibly help save my life. I think it also puts them at ease knowing that I am comfortable.

Anyway while waiting for the mighty doctor to make his presence known so surgery could start, I was talking to the anesthesiologist. She was giving me the regular rigmarole out what is going to happen. It's old hat by now. But as soon as she said that I should start coming down from 10 I said, "Good, I could use a nap. I am fuck tired." Half of people in the room snorted. Then I was out like a light.

The next thing I knew I was getting pushed to my room. The weird part about that is that I usually wake up in the PACU. That is where they put you after surgery to make sure that anesthesia doesn't have a negative effect. I usually wake up right after surgery and have a conversation with the PACU nurse. This time I don't even remember talking to the doctor after surgery.

When I got to the room after the surgery, my PACU nurse actually brought me to my room because there was no transport people. Anyway, she was explaining how Clint is doing very well, we have had a great conversation and I wish you luck. With that, she was gone. I was looking around like I don't remember her and I don't remember this conversation we had. Evidently it was great. I wish I knew what we were talking about. That is kind of scary. Knowing me it could have been anything. The nurse in the room could tell I was looking a little confused. She asked me if I knew what the date was. I think I replied back September. She then asked me if I knew the date and year. I had no clue. I can't remember what I said but I remember the look on Kiara when I answered. Kiara was shocked by my answer. Evidently it wasn't right. Then the nurse said she is going to have to keep an eye on me. That was the first time I have ever experienced anything like that.

So the next day I am back in the OR and we are waiting for the doctor, again. During this waiting time I am mingling and reminiscing with some of the nurses I have seen before. Good times. It seems like every time one of the nurses knows someone from Enderlin or they know me and they proceed to tell an interesting story that happened. It usually starts out like, "Do you know so and so?" Or "Do you remember that time?" Anyway, the next thing I know the anesthesiologist wants me to count down again from 10. So instead of doing what she told me, I start whistling "Patience" by Guns N Roses. It's my go to tune. She just rolled her eyes.

Next thing I know I am in my room. This time I missed the total time I spent in the PACU. I don't remember talking to the doctor. And of course I had a different nurse this day. She asked a bunch of questions and I got about a third of them right. Then it was shift change. So I had to do it all over again and this time I got three quarters of the questions right. Good times. Not remembering stuff is not fun.

Sidebar: I have always wondered why they don’t pair you up with the same nurse if you are going to be on the same floor days in a row. Wouldn't it make life easier for both the patient and the nurse? You wouldn't have to explain yourself over and over again. Things would be more familiar for all parties involved. You would think there would be fewer mistakes. You would think there would be less of a hassle. You would think this would be done just because of common sense. But I digress.

My right side kidney stone surgeries are scheduled for next week. It seems something always happens when I am at the hospital. No matter why I am there. I wonder who I will meet this time. I wonder what will happen. I know one thing it will be entertaining.

Thanks for reading, Clint

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